FOREWORD : Don’t read this if you don’t want to waste your time reading the random rants of a 22 year old.
The society is result-oriented.
People like statistics.
Who scored the highest runs in the tournament? Who was the class topper this year? How much did the guy who topped 10th board exams this year score? How much salary does the new job offer you?
They like the headlines. But, they don’t want to read through the entire news article. They are in a hurry.
I plod on, unapplauded. It has been a rather long journey. Six years now. I have always wanted to do something spectacular. As a child, I always wanted to feature in the local newspaper headlines that screamed out : “Guwahati boy tops 10th board exams”.
I was ambitious, but in the wrong things. I overlooked the talents I already possessed, which were sufficient to propel me in a career that required creativity. To propel me. To help me excel, with relative ease. To make a mark.
But, like every other kid my age, I gave in to the media driven pressure to become an Engineer, conveniently forgetting how I hated everything that is mechanical. Forgetting how I hated the dull, big, clumsy, unromantic machines. I just wanted the tag – “ENGINEER”. Forgetting how the ‘written word’ was always my forte.
I have made some gloriously wrong decisions in life. I have made some big, big blunders in life. Which make me stand here today, as just another mediocre guy, trying to push his way ahead, but failing, miserably.
I look around, to see my friends, who took all the correct decisions in life, who are doing well today. Everyone talks about them, their achievements, their successes. They are IN.
Just for a moment, I too, crave for some recognition, some accolades, some note of appreciation, for the six years I spent trying. Don’t i deserve some kind words for my efforts? I never hit anything big, I agree, but just for the fact that I didn’t simply give up, when the chips were (and still are) down.
I could have thrown my arms in the air in despair, and just given up, but I didn’t. I persevered and survived the science stream, first, and then I struggled with Math Honours. Never gave up. For a moment. Isn’t that worth appreciation?
No marks for trying???