No marks for trying???

FOREWORD : Don’t read this if you don’t want to waste your time reading the random rants of a 22 year old.

The society is result-oriented.
People like statistics.
Who scored the highest runs in the tournament? Who was the class topper this year? How much did the guy who topped 10th board exams this year score? How much salary does the new job offer you?
They like the headlines. But, they don’t want to read through the entire news article. They are in a hurry.

I plod on, unapplauded. It has been a rather long journey. Six years now. I have always wanted to do something spectacular. As a child, I always wanted to feature in the local newspaper headlines that screamed out : “Guwahati boy tops 10th board exams”.

I was ambitious, but in the wrong things. I overlooked the talents I already possessed, which were sufficient to propel me in a career that required creativity. To propel me. To help me excel, with relative ease. To make a mark.

But, like every other kid my age, I gave in to the media driven pressure to become an Engineer, conveniently forgetting how I hated everything that is mechanical. Forgetting how I hated the dull, big, clumsy, unromantic machines. I just wanted the tag – “ENGINEER”. Forgetting how the ‘written word’ was always my forte.

I have made some gloriously wrong decisions in life. I have made some big, big blunders in life. Which make me stand here today, as just another mediocre guy, trying to push his way ahead, but failing, miserably.

I look around, to see my friends, who took all the correct decisions in life, who are doing well today. Everyone talks about them, their achievements, their successes. They are IN.

Just for a moment, I too, crave for some recognition, some accolades, some note of appreciation, for the six years I spent trying. Don’t i deserve some kind words for my efforts? I never hit anything big, I agree, but just for the fact that I didn’t simply give up, when the chips were (and still are) down.

I could have thrown my arms in the air in despair, and just given up, but I didn’t. I persevered and survived the science stream, first, and then I struggled with Math Honours. Never gave up. For a moment. Isn’t that worth appreciation?

No marks for trying???

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8 comments on “No marks for trying???

  1. The universe applauds you when you follow your true hearts desire. In your case it’s writing, and your exceptionally good at it. Keep going with your honest blogs, they are refreshing and inspiring x

  2. I have made some gloriously wrong decisions in life. I have made some big, big blunders in life. Which make me stand here today, as just another mediocre guy, trying to push his way ahead, but failing, miserably….. Join the club!

    Had a great time reading your blogs… Keep posting.

  3. Thank you Charlotte and Allwin!!

  4. Seemanta Mitra says:

    Well,buddy, this is a great start…rather RESTART. Carry on. It’s not too late yet. The “written word” is your forte. Continue dear. You’ll see your name in print one day, I’m sure. And I m not consoling you, mind it. You will. Honest.

  5. Monika Bakshi Singh says:

    I have been your teacher..a proud teacher. Ask me what is your worth! I have known you as a serious guy who is creative, romantic (in literary sense), a great singer and musician (who once helped my team win the first prize in Chorus singing competition), a FANTASTIC writer who has a great vocabulary and who inspires me. I appreciate you from the fathoms of my heart’s core. You are awesome. I shall wait for the day when I will receive your autographed novel.

Let me know what you are thinking. . .

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